Callum was so confident with the girls ability that he committed to 12 of us versus 13 of them. I’m not sure if he would have reconsidered when he realised how grossly underprepared we were. For a start, their coach had binoculars and an Assistant Coach!
Oh, hang on, we had one too, we’d like you to meet Fairweather Fev or the Invisible Man, you choose, he was going to turn up but decided against it when he heard we weren’t a dead cert.
The action started immediately – the opposition got the ball straight out of the ruck and after 30 seconds of play we had the first points scored against us…. (Spoiler alert!) Just so you all know, it was a lot more fun to write this completely uninformed match report when we were winning every game, but on we go!
Snapped out of our Sunday morning lethargy by this slap in the face the girls scrambled and after a good mark and kick by Mika, Mia S and Mia K got the ball to Batman who celebrated her birthday by getting our first goal. Andy was almost unrecognisable with his fancy new Umpires shirt and controlled the action on the pitch like he felt as pretty as he looked.
Lizzie was kept busy and giving as good as she got in the backs. Maybe your Mum calling “go you grumpy thing” is uplifting after all. It wouldn’t have mattered though if we’d had Tony Robbins on the side lines because at this point it was looking grim and in no time at all they had added another goal and a behind. We fought back with an AMAZING mark by Squiz then a behind by Elicia and Mia K.
The second quarter was a bit more of the same. All the action was in the Midfield and Backs and our forwards were left to come up with ways to stay warm. Before we could say ……. they got another goal and two more behinds.
The half time talk turned into a half time whinge. The girls seemed more interested in focussing on what the other girls were doing so Callum pointed out that you can only change the way you play the game. And then Fev said ……. Oh, nothing, that’s right, ‘CAUSE FEV WASN’T THERE. Let’s all think about that for a moment, not Fev, but what Callum said.
My notes for the 3rd quarter say. Goal them, Goal them. Squiz GOAL!! Goal them. Ugh they won that quarter.
Callum then told someone to “get in the box” and someone else to “attack the ball”. If you’ve just come in now this is not a ‘what not to do at the dog park’ lesson but legitimate coaching terms.. Apparently.
The last quarter was crazy busy. They got a goal, then Batman got another goal and then they got 3 more behinds. So I left. Nah, just kidding. The girls did really well despite the final score and by the end of the game were matching St Peters in attack and defence. A little bit more work on our goal kicking and we will be real contenders. Callum wrapped it up by saying that we need to play all 4 quarters and if we do we’ll make a real impact on the competition. I’m paraphrasing of course but you get the gist. Until then we will give credit where credit is due. Mia K was BOG, Stefi got the training award , Squiz and Batman got coaches awards and so did Lottie for doing the Assistant Coach role because, in case you missed it, Brendan wasn’t there.
Let this be a lesson to you all – just because you don’t turn up doesn’t mean you don’t get a mention!
The End.
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